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God's Girl
Huilun
13.10.1992
Singapore Life Church
GMS(P),GMS(S),CJC, NTU





Provided by International Bible Society


Sunday, October 29, 2006

ever felt so degraded to the bottomless pit? i have. well. for today. i dunno wadz goin on. wadz she trying to probe outta me. i dun hv the ans. i dun understand. things can be better. can it? hopefully it wont stay like tis. if not when the maid is gone, i'll wound up doineverything. she questions me on so many things. i simply dun understand. its not like i've offended her or anything. i carry out her instructions. but is it too much? i carry out until i can hardly breathe and she juz eats from it until the only pieces of me left is juz my toes? a birthday, its a special event. its extremly special since my family is huge and everything. on my bro's b-dae, we had a b'dae home party, my elder sis, we got out almost all the time. my younger sis, her wishes granted. mine, my parents are either not at home or 24hrs late. so it wont be my b'dae anymore. tis yr especially. i waited till 12+am for them to come back juz so they cld celebrate my b'dae. they came home almost 4got the celebdrate my b'dae. mind u, i was haf-awake while waiting. my eyes lids were DROOPPING. they came back, almost 4got my b'dae b4 getting the cake out and got the "party" started. didnt even hear a word of "happy birthday!" frm them at all. until afternoon, the 1st greeting frm my elder sis. den my mum. den at 12++am my dad. den during the celebration, my bro was sleeping, my younger sis was complaining. my elder sis was the most enthu and my mum was complain 1/4 the time and my dad was neutral. after cutting the cake i immediately left the freakin hall and went into my room and cried until i slept. so much for a "happy" birthday. my results came out as u noe. my mum was complaing the whole time when she was lookin thru my grades. she onli stopped when ivy choong actually said i did well. den she shut up. today church brought us to east coast. she thinks i'll do sumting stupid again. tis shows she doesnt trust me. hate her 4 dat. she tinks a complain to the whole wide world abt her. hate her again for not trusting me. WHO WLDNT? tis is UR life, u'ld most lykly at least tell ur good frenz! sheesh! cant believe her. cant beleive she treats me tis way. she COMMANDED me to palce the food out today, clean the freakin toilet, keep the freakin snacks and everything when she noes i came back frm east coast and ccis prac. i must be dead tired. she didnt even think of dat. dun wanna tell her anything abt my life. why? she tinks i've got too many guy frenz. she doesnt think i'll do well havin such INFLUENCES. sheesh. hate dat.