<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d17069469\x26blogName\x3dwrapped+in+God\x27s+LOVE..\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_BLOGSPOT\x26navbarType\x3dSILVER\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttps://silver-beast.blogspot.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://silver-beast.blogspot.com/\x26vt\x3d1377261516612669488', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe", messageHandlersFilter: gapi.iframes.CROSS_ORIGIN_IFRAMES_FILTER, messageHandlers: { 'blogger-ping': function() {} } }); } }); </script>
God's Girl
Huilun
13.10.1992
Singapore Life Church
GMS(P),GMS(S),CJC, NTU





Provided by International Bible Society


Monday, June 10, 2013
Goodbye, delete

I never knew it was so difficult to type goodbye. Just two words. Goodbye _. So difficult.
I couldn't even do it. I TYPED not even SAID. But TYPED "bye" instead of "goodbye". Because honestly in my heart the situation was FAR from good.

I said bye _ instead. Today I let go officially and significantly also. Just let go. Let God. 

Today I also realised how tired I am. Tired of worrying tired of being scared. Tired of trying when I shouldn't. So I gave up. I gave up literally to God. Even told Joel to pray for me cause I was THAT tired I couldn't form the words out of my mouth in the midst of all those tears. Tears of release and of letting go. Tears of joy and also tears of pain knowing it may be the last and official time I can get a chance to say goodbye. 

Today u experienced release of pain from saying my final goodbye.
But after that I couldn't delete it. I just couldn't I shake with fear of the unknwin. I'm like so sentimental I would like keep that convo but I deleted it. It took me the whole day till jun tian held my hand then I had the strength to delete it. Thanks juntain. 

Bye, delete. 
These words just never occur to me to be buried with such meaning till now.
I promised to stop
I will stop
I will just let God do his work and go to sleep. 

Ilyz. I will wait for you.