CHRIST THE LORD;;my saviour

Saturday, June 27, 2009

ohmygosh, this is just so annoying and so saddening, like draining the life outta me, i'm so tired, physically and emotionally. serious. i want to believe everything is fine and dandy but how can i when everytime i think everything will turn out fine there is this stick poking me at the back. grah. i'm really so tired, and i wanna sleep, but i cant sleep without thinking abt it, thinking abt it will just make me feel worse, and thus i cant sleep. grah. gah, grah, grah. at times like these, i really need to prayyyy. :////

i somehow knew this was coming, but its like everytime i try to mend it its just another stab. grah me grah you. grahgrahgrah. just when i like totally pick myself up this has gotta happen to me and turn my whole entire life topsy turvy. but i must say i have been having better days these last few weeks after church camp. studying at church, just totally blocks me off from the worldand focus on the books aside from chatting with kerin, zihow, dora. like its just me, my books in God's place. studying there just relaxes me and help me not think of all these things. but instead lead me to think abt my cell grp, my studies, the bible study thing i hope to work and all. i really hope the bible study thing will turn out fine, or maybe better than that. i totally know i'll be so tired and drained if it starts, but i really want something to be done. and seing how good the response is so far, i hope it'll cont and not just die down after the heat is over.

what to say? i guess i can only go back to the bible, pray earnestly and pray for an enlightening.

i shall pay a trip to verse of the day once again.

Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked, for the LORD will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared.
— Proverbs 3:25-26

i take from verse of the day. hmm, i guess i must try to memorise this verse, after reading it just makes me feel so much better!

THANKYOUGOD.

i really cant tell anyone except those few who knows whats going on, but its already so late! so they're all asleep, at least i still have GOD. :)

yay. i feel peaceful enough to sleep now! :)

NITEY NITE NITE.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

27 DRESSES!

i've ALWAYS WANTED TO WATCH THIS MOVIE!
then i saw it on HBO just now, stopped playing sims and sat infront of the tv to enjoy the long-desired movie :)

I REALLY REALLY LOVE THE FACT THAT SHE LOVES HER SISTER AND FRIENDS SO MUCH SHE ALWAYS SAYS "YES" TO THEM! :)

i hope i can be like that also, but then again, also know when to say no. hehe :)

ahh, wells. i really like her since i love GREY'S ANATOMY, and also i like the lead guy also cause he was staring in x-men and hairspray. haha. so i was so happy they got together. hahaha.

ahh wells, that aside, haha. I MADE OREO CAKES! or muffins lar. haha. SO HAPPY! GONNE BRING IT TO CHURCH TML:)

hopefully it wont MELT :(

haha. anwyas, tml is SUNDAY, so must sleep early for church!

&&! tonight i'm gonna sleep in XINHUI'S bed cause she is in BATAM with DORA and AARON and my DEAR DEAR DEAR maid, SITI! :(

i miss them all! haha.

&&! tml is 1520 sports day :) so i hope we win! i'm off to bed, or rather fb! TOODLES :)

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better.
— Ephesians 1:17 (NIV)

haha, i saw this verse on http://www.verseoftheday.com/ :)

&&! I decided to put a few nice shots from yizhen's camera of the camp here :)))

omgosh! i totally feel like a pig now:)

i like totally slept at 3am last night woke at 9am den slept at 1.30pm till 5pm. HAHAHAHA.

so i'm so energetic now. hahahaha. i'm such a pig lar. hahaha.

anyways, today i am gonna go celebrate FATHER'S DAY && PAPA'S BIRTHDAY.

&& i was randomly looking at photos in the computer and found these :D

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

i can only imagine//lifeIMPACT!

Matthew 16:24-28
24Then Jesus said to the disciples:" If anyone wants to be my follower, he must put aside his selfish ambitions, shoulder his cross and follow me. 25If you try to keep your life for yourself, you will lose it. But if you give your life to me, you will find true life. 26And how do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul in the process? Is anything worth more than your soul? 27 For I, the Son of Man, will come in the glory of my Father with his angels and will judge all people according to their deeds. 28 And I assure you that some of you standing here right now will not die before you see me, the Son of Man, coming in my Kingdom."

haha, like what i did in 1520 blog, i shall start with this video: tribute to rick hoyt.

I can only imagine
What it will be like
When I walk
By your side

I can only imagine
What my eyes will see
When your face
Is before me
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

[Chorus:]
Surrounded by Your glory, what will my heart feel
Will I dance for you Jesus or in awe of you be still
Will I stand in your presence or to my knees will I fall
Will I sing hallelujah, will I be able to speak at all
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

I can only imagine
When that day comes
And I find myself
Standing in the Son

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever
Forever worship You
I can only imagine

I can only imagine

[Chorus]

I can only imagine [x2]

I can only imagine
When all I will do
Is forever, forever worship you

I can only imagine

yes, indeed i can only imagine, imagine how it is to be incapable of doing anything, imagine how it is to feel as if i have been rejected by what i created, imagine how painful it is to see my one and only son suffer, imagine so much. how will i dare say that i understand? i will never be able to fathom your love, your unending mercy and faith in us. :)

the lyrics are so touching isnt it? i really hope i can do what the chorus says.
surrounded by his glory, standing in his presence, singing hallelujah. and maybe his glory will be so overpowering that i have to fall to my knees, that i have to cry because i cant rejoice anymore, and not speak cause words a lone cannot describe his love for us.

this camp has really made me feel that i can do much more for God but how? it has also made me want to reach out more of my friends cause of how the ending of the game for me made me feel as if i was one of my friends who never heard of Jesus and then game ended just like that for them. but this time, it wont be just a game, it will be more than a game. it will be real, it will break my heart, it will break theirs as well. i cant expose anything that happened during the camp cause it was too great to explain and we arent allowed, cause it'll spoil the game. but it was just so wonderful. i did not regret not going finland, cause if i did, i wont know so many new friends.

this camp also made me realise that God really wants us to be one big family cause he brought us tgt, different service and different church in the camp. inter grating us to bond, and feel so much more like a family now. like how so many of the girls in my dorm were supposed to be somewhere else, but cause of swine flu, their trips got canceled and they were in the same room as me. haha. which is so totally cool :) if God can bring us all tgt just like that there is no wondering how much MORE he can do. isnt it scary yet so wonderful?

this camp also reminded me not to hold on to the materialistic things of this world, cause really when we leave this world, we bring nothing with us, except our souls. i was so sad that i couldnt fulfill what God wanted me to do in the game, i managed to do what I wanted, managed to get married like i wanted, managed to manage my business not too well, managed to bank in money, managed to pay my taxes and bills, meet my daily requirements. but i forgot one thing i had in the real world, i had church, i had a God i could serve, and i missed out the most important thing, when i served God sure it was tiring and tough, but i enjoyed it, i enjoyed the ending of it, after finish serving that aspect. it makes me so happy that i wanna go ahead and serve him again in my best capacity. :)

i really miss peacehaven :( like so much memories and moths. haha.
anyways, enough of my lessons learnt, what happened there was just unforgettable.
okay, i dunno why i cant upload my hpotos :( all in fb la. haha.

anyways, 1st day:
bus ride was killer, after it i had an acheing back and i felt like a grandpa.
when we reached i was so tired. haha. but i played sims3 on my phone, courtesy of kerin. haha.
den we started lifegame immediately, started with the immigration screening, it was so peculiar. haha.
den we went straight into the game after that. met my dorm mates and went absolutely nuts with miwie, yizhen, kerin and candice.

2nd day:
cont with life game, so many unexpected things happened on the 2nd day. ended the day by talking into the night with abundant life ministries girls. haha, lydia, debra, bernice, jun may, valerie. haha.

3rd day:
cont with game, VERY UNEXPECTED HAPPENED, and i got "married" to ziyi, after 3 cycles, which totally took my life away. i was like marriage background for like EVER. haha.
den after that cried a little here and there. i was controlling my tears so much. hahaha. den night came and we went crazy, I DIDNT NOT SLEEP, i repeat not a wink. haha.
the night i can blog abt it. haha.

so last night of camp, as usual, did not sleep. at 1st went downstairs with yizhen, minwei, candice and the guys. cause wanted to play captian's ball in the dark. but couldnt cause too dark and the ball lend to ABLM people. den went to sit in the cool cool night outside, the bench there. so cold. haha. sat there with weijing, watched the stars. and i felt as if Angels were looking down over me. i felt so overwhelmed by God's creation. haha. den after like what seemed forever, me and weijing went back into the building den sat down and he went to play cards, i went to talk to weifu, minwei, cheryl, xinhui.

den after that i wanted to clip my hair up, so i went upstairs, was interrupted by kerin and shiying on the way up, so stopped and talked to them. well not exactly, they were making fun of me as usual.
den after that marissa asked me to play asshole taiti with eng serv ppl, so i decided to sit down and play with them. haha. then i realised what a bunch of crazy friends i just made! hahaha. we played taiti, den ziyi was like the ultimate asshole taiti king and gabriel and zihow took turns to lose. HAHAHA. so funny. i was so happy, for once i didnt become the asshole. hahaha.

den after that they ran out of things to paly, i kept suggesting we paly pepsi cola, but they keep ignoring my request. den after that we palyed truth or dare. haha. gabriel did the run across the girl's dorm shouting hurrah and he went into my dorm and said: "rise and shine" hahaha. den zihow woke candice up to say i love you. HAHA! dne marissa shake candice until she woke up den said: h sry, wrong person". hahaha. so mean, while they were doing that i was saying we shouldnt disturb sleeping ppl, and obviously they ignored my request again. :(

DEN, finally gabriel and ziyi said okay to play with me pepsi cola, i was so happy! :) yay! :)
i've been wanting to play it for so long. hahahaha :)
1st round i won! :)
den we went back and sat down and palyed heart attack. haha. zihow was so funny, he was so slow. haha.
den after that we played pepsi cola again, this time more ppl. haha. we played a few rounds, and i lost all :( always left with kerin, ziyi and one more person. hahaha.
den ziyi decided to do cartwheel and call it ONE STEP, i was so shocked, but i pretended not to be shocked. hahahaha. i dun even know why i did that. haha.

DEN, everybody decided they were tired, and sat around the table, so i sat with grace and ziyi and we talked, cause the other table was full. den i talk to grace for like a while, den grace left, so i talked to ziyi for a while also, den b4 you knew it it was 630am already. :(
so fast. haha. but i felt as if we were talking for more than that amount of time, casue it was like, i in a while never talk to someone like abt the things going through my head, so when i was tlaking to ziyi, it was like lifting 1 quarter of my load from my chest. felt so much better after that. haha. so thanks a lot ziyi :)

den next day came, packed, moved out of the dorm, sulked. cause i realised we're going back to Singapore, where all my problems lie waiting for me to solve. :(

went to awana for combine church gathering. took the biggest photo ever and went KL to shop. wah sei the place reminded me of paragon lar. cannot shop one, just go there and window shop and mke myself feel poor. hahaha.
den after that went straight back to singapore, can imagine lar, i slept almost the whole way. and also when we were in awana for combined church service, i slept EVERYTIME they prayed. hahahaha. so tired. haha.

den ytd, i had to wake up early, go CJ for choir. so very tired. and today i went to church to mug with zihow. haha. we took photos of our nanos :) hahahaha. ah wells, its late. i shall go sleep now then :)

toodles;; GOD LOVES US ALL :)
-i can only imagine.

Monday, June 08, 2009

i've been feeling like listening to chinese songs recently. haha, so i was going through my chinese playlist, den i found this song! haha. i totally LOVE IT. haha.

for some weird reason, i just got myself all hooked onto it all over again. ah well, this is just one of the SHE songs i like lar. haha. rarely like any of them. hahaha. just some :)

well, maybe at the same time cause i've been thinking about some stuff. stuff i dun think i would be able to share with anyone. haha. i just don't think so. thats all ;)

落泪以前再看一眼你模糊侧脸
这会不会是最后纪念
我凝视你而你凝视着窗外的阴天
一句抱歉都僵在嘴边

我搞不懂我们到底怎么了
诚实的背后是否住着伤口
我想不通我们的爱怎么了
雨下过以后是否能让什么复活

你的项链还在胸前晃动着昨天
为何回忆会让人晕眩
如果我们继续向前走进雨里面
会不会有溶解的危险

我搞不懂我们到底怎么了
诚实的背后是否住着伤口
我想不通我们的爱怎么了
雨下过以后是否能让什么复活

明明从前连争执都很甜美
现在怎会说句话就能痛一遍

我搞不懂我们到底怎么了
诚实的背后是否住着伤口
我想不通我们的爱怎么了
雨下过以后是否能让什么复活

okay, anyways, i have to mug! midyrs all SO on the way, i have to diet, there is church camp, and choir to juggle. noit to forget f4-2 night cylcing on wed night, den i have to wake up early to go church on thurs morning, and also T20's bbq. haha. WHOO. not to forget i still need to make time the NEXT TWO DAYS, so prepare my praiseteam for THE FIRST DAY OF CAMP. i'm SO TOASTED. and i think i havent been a good friend to so many people recently :( this is SO SO BAD. i really need God now. like really. not like i didnt need him b4, i just feel so... hmmm recently. BAH.

a mugging i will go.